1. |
Old Blue
05:15
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blue
i’m turning blue
right in front of you
can’t you see?
red
i’m pumping red
all throughout my chest
can’t you feel me?
run
i’ve got to run
looks like you’re having so much fun
without me
i’m fine
i’m so fine
i’d just rather pass the time
without you near me
and all the things i never said
the bleeding heart you’ve never met
i let you walk away from it
i let you turn your face instead
but i’m begging you to let me in
i’m begging you to let me in
i’m wishing that i’d let you see
the image that is haunting me
the image that is haunting me
the image that is haunting me
the image that is haunting me
the image staring back at me
will you ever know this part of me?
will you ever know this part of me?
will you ever see the things i see?
if you see it will it set me free?
if you see it will it set me free?
if you see it will it set me free?
if you see it will it set me free?
if you see it will it set me free?
blue
my old friend blue
always sticking right by you
holding all your truth
my old friend blue
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2. |
Strangers
04:34
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we were strangers for all of those years
now we’re strangers of a different kind my dear
so did you love me
or just the idea?
now i’m living one foot step away
i feel further and further each day
so did you need me
to want it that way?
do you think that i could stop reliving it?
it’s so strange to think that i
still have to live with it
i have to live with it
if i’d really seen you, would it have come as a surprise
that you’d never value me over your pride?
so did i know you
or was it some other guy?
so here’s to thinking it all meant more than it did
and starting over with some other person
here’s to making the same mistakes again
and again
and again
do you think that i could stop reliving it?
it’s so strange to think that i
still have to live with it
i have to live with it
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3. |
In the Morning
03:02
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here i am again
seems all of my life is deliverance
i’m wading in the weight of it
best i can
and everything takes time
that’s what they say, darling, isn’t it?
but i don’t have patience for the pain of it
anymore
in the morning i’m gone
traveling roads i know too well
searching for the places i call myself
i only want you in the evening time
when this earth makes up her mind
to die another day
wish we could all go that way
like setting suns on the horizon line
wish i could drown this fucking heart of mine
in that lilac painted ocean spreading wide
wish i could find some way to pass this time
instead of loving you
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4. |
Full Bloom
04:19
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in the back of my father’s chevy
i waited for cop lights to shine
i was sure that they would
he never made it mine
like he promised he would
he never made it mine
now i’m running reds
like i’ve got someplace to be
the palisades will wait for me
i never thought i would come
and now i’ll never leave
i never thought i would come
and all the while i thought that
i would never find another place to need
you took me in the back room
i waited to feel anything
the city lights in full bloom
i’m heavy with the weight of things
took myself to the coast to breath
the ocean air, to taste infinity
i didn’t want to escape
i wanted to believe
i wasn’t trying to run
that was a first for me
home’s a word i’ve been using lately
to describe so many different things
of which my body’s not one
keep wanting to believe
i can make myself numb
to insecurity
but barely understanding
is the only way that i have learned to see
you took me in the back room
i waited to feel anything
the city lights in full bloom
i’m heavy with the weight of things
you took me in the back room
i waited to feel anything
the city lights in full bloom
i’m heavy with the weight of things
mother, brother, father
have you ever seen the waves?
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5. |
Tell Me
05:03
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tell me
do you get up in the mornings
without first checking your cell screen?
do you start every day new?
tell me
do you make pancakes and coffee?
if i don’t eat will you judge me?
it’s just that my face is filling out
and i’ve never known how to take
care of myself in the mornings
when defenses are high and i’m still
dreaming things changed
take care of myself in the mornings
so i’m not erased
every night when i go under covers
i take off my clothes undercover
it’s easier just not to see
and the nights when i go undercover
and touch myself under the covers
i dream that you love what you see
and at least when i come i can
face into the quiet of the evening
when defenses are low and
i’m wishing i’d change
and into the quiet of the evening
i’ll be erased
what do you think when
you’re walking alone in
the gloaming? i want to escape to
the place where i live in your mind
cause when you
get drunk and say something about bowie
i don’t understand but i want to
and i think i feel your eyes
getting tired of me
and i want
a love that’s embarrassing
i want
to know my own limits
cause i want
more than i know how to give
so tell me
do you think that you could love me?
do you see something that’s something?
or do you see nothing at all?
and at least when i come i can
face into the quiet of the evening
for two seconds i’m drenched in
a love that’s my own
and into the quiet of the evening
i’ll find home
tell me
can we make love in the morning?
fuck eating pancakes and coffee
i just want to drown in
the light
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6. |
Every Time
04:36
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in the midnight i fall
you catch me
you are always on call
and in the darkness i can fool myself
not seeing you were never there at all
i’m never sure that you were real at all
all this heat’s left me dry
just wishing i could spend my evenings home crying
and that’s the point of this whole mess isn’t it?
keep finding new ways just to feel alive
too bad that living always feels like dying
what is there left to do
but fall into the labyrinth of my mind?
what would you have to say
to make the fear evaporate?
i need something to hold onto
that isn’t you
smoke your last cigarette
i promise after this i’ll quit
but the addiction’s only part of it
it’s so much harder just to try to exist
all this uncertainty, it makes me feel sick
what is there left to do
but fall into the labyrinth of my mind?
what would you have to say
to make the fear evaporate?
i need something to hold onto
that isn’t you
and i’ve become increasingly dependent on your smile
it’s the cul-de-sac that i forget to turn around in every time
and it’s the picture i’m hanging on my shelf
just like me to forget my health
every time
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7. |
Bleeders
04:02
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blue eyes
tearing their way through my heart
all your true lies
i sentence myself, it’s the darkest part of
your holy grip on me
honestly i am alone
honestly you are alone
i’ve got bleeders
uncauterized
there’s the hole
stick your fingers
into its deep
there’s no other side left
to hold itself to me
honestly you are my home
honestly i am alone
and all at once
everything matters a little less
oh sweet god of promises
casting its shadows on doubt
before i know no price to pay
i will wake up where it’s warm
and all at once
everything matters a little less
oh sweet god of promises
casting its shadows on doubt
before i know no price to pay
i will wake up where it’s warm
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8. |
All I've Known
06:18
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lately i’ve been sinking stones to find out where
they’ll land
i won’t ever get to see them but it’s a game
i can understand
and how long before we find light
where we left it in the blinds?
i won’t ever get to know you
but it’s a game that i haven’t tried
and it’s a cold stare you’re giving
hanging out in the yard
and it’s a bruised wine you’ve got me
drinking outside this bar
and all i know is
all i’ve known
lately i’ve been waking up to find
i’ve been misplaced
scattered longing is a stillness
hanging over all my days
and in false light i can see myself in you
i just wanna know your secrets
i just wanna know the truth
and it’s a cold glare i’m giving
sitting out beneath the stars
and it’s a bruised sigh that’s got you
thinking i know what i want
and i am so deluded
i keep on feeling this is all my fault
again and again
and all i know is
all i’ve known
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9. |
For (Runnner Remix)
03:20
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A.O. Gerber Los Angeles, California
A.O. Gerber is a singer-songwriter based in Los Angeles, CA.
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